First of all, I want to clarify that I am more than happy when an old flame, an ex-boyfriend or a crush finds his soul mate and commits to a serious relationship. Truly, I am happy for him. I believe that if we were meant to be, we would’ve worked out at some point in time, but we did not and there is someone out there waiting to make me his life partner.
We have come to accept that monogamy will eventually lead to marriage and the birth of a family. Right? Right!
I believe that any relationship should be based on mutual trust and honest communication. What first attracted you to your partner is based on the physical. We are humans and what is appealing and beautiful interests us. One conversation, or one date, can set the beginning or the halt of a future relationship. Then the feeling of Love develops. A beautiful thing to experience.
Married couple will assure me that love fades away after the years. I cannot agree nor disagree with that statement since I have not been married yet but I will have to shed light on the roots of such statement.
I have witnessed that many of the married couple (and those in a serious relationship for more that two years) grow apart after sometime. They take their situation for granted and let them selves fade away (physically & mentally). They do not put the same amount of effort they used to when at the start of their relationship and blame one another for the lack of it.
Compromise isn’t part of their vocabulary anymore. How did that simple and important notion disappear with time? and most importantly, why?
I know of a few women who turned their attention fully to their toddlers and forgot the most important child in their lives; their husbands. It is a shame that one added family member sometimes distorts the unity of a family. The tone between husband and wife is no longer the same. The attention span no longer directed equally to each. A baby takes a mother’s full attention, at the expense of the husband. Yes a baby is everything. However, compromising your time between your husband and you child should not get to the point of him feeling neglected, his attention lingering outside your home.
Nowadays, it is easy for men to connect with someone outside the confine of their family dynamic with a single click from within the confine of the family room.
Yes, social media plays an important part in pursuing that extra-curricular activity. A simple hello from an ex triggers question marks. I am sure you agree with me when I say that a tentative reconnect from an ‘in a relationship’ man is not as innocent as he tries to portray (you, women are not as innocent as well, the percentage of bitches is alarmingly increasing—it is just that this blog post is not directed to you).
In my opinion, it is best to cut short this sudden caring concern catch- up session as early as detected. Personally, I feel sorry for that person’s girlfriend and thank God I am not in her shoes. Married men behaving this way (whether my friend or not) just disgust me. How about an ex- boyfriend? Well I am grateful not to have been legally bound to him.
Again, as I was saying above, respect is important. Without it, trust me, you are better off without him. If he doesn’t respect you, he doesn’t deserve you.
Keep in mind that if you are the pushing him away unintentionally (with some tiny amount of awareness–>because he constantly told you of that) you got it coming honey!
Now YOU; Men, if you are not happy in your current situation, which you are not since you are taking the time and effort to establish a connection with the rest of the female population, one solution comes to my mind; switch to #TeamSingle. Hence, you are not being the hypocrite you are towards your other half and mostly to yourself. And as for those who are bound by marriage; either get a divorce or suck it up boo.
Most of the single women I know have not completely given up on love and marriage. Many of them respect themselves to the extent not to be entangled in a triangular love nest. Now there are surely those who take upon themselves a challenge to snatch you away from your woman but I won’t get into that debacle. I find that being a total bitch. However if you have succeeded your quest, kindly do not forget one important fact; Once a cheater, always a cheater!
In a nutshell; How many of you can surely tell me that you would blindly commit to your other half and make things work?
I can’t hear you! Never mind. My motto has always been; Talk is cheap- Actions speaks louder than words.
To the single women out there, do not linger on your past relationship. You know that you were not fully happy and ready to commit to that person for the rest of your life. Those failed relationships made you the person you are today and paved the way to know what you want in life and from your future partner and most importantly how to handle any given situation.
I know that ‘I would bleed my self dry’ (Coldplay- Yellow) for my man and he would do the same to me.
I am tired….
Off to sleep..Snooze babies xo