He is 35.
He still lives with his parents (the economical situation of the country. obliges.)
He works a 9-5 job at some insurance company (security, stability..boring!)
His weekends are dedicated to sports and (wait for it) his Momma.
Born and raised abroad, Richard moved back to his home country with his parents at the end of the civil war and attended one of the best schools and colleges in the city. He pursued his graduate studies in the United States and held for a small period of time a job in one of the leading financial cities in the world..only to come back to Lebanon after a couple of years.
“Why Richie, why??” – I’ll tell you in a few..
As an outsider to Richard’S private life, any person would envy the opportunities that were given to him on a silver platter. However, we would not understand the reasons behind the refusal of immigrating and starting a better life abroad.
The reason is simple: His Mama!
We all know that girls are close to their fathers (guilty!!) whereas most boys are even closer to their mothers. A logical explanation being the following; a mother is the first real relationship a boy has with a person from the opposite sex. A mother caters to her child’s every whim, takes care of him and protects him from the outside world. She provides him with infinite affection and love no matter what. She is his shield and armor from the big bad people out there (Oh Dear!!!).
Rolls eyes…there should be a standard limitation mind you…
This is a very challenging situation for any woman who wants to be part of Richard’s personal life. No matter the love that Richie holds to his girlfriend, his mother is always going to come first. When he needs work related advice, he is going to ask for his mother’s opinion. When problems arise in the love domain (to his mother’s delight) guess who is going to amend those shattered glasses?
If he is sick and can’t go out that night, don’t you be worried, his mother’s magical soup and attention will be sufficient to overcome the sleepless nights.
“‘It is best you don’t pass by babe, I’m contagious” (aww concerned boo!)–mommy dearest is here (mmm whatev!)..
Some weekends will be booked to a “mother and son” catching up lunches (dinner dates as well!!) because living in the same house is quite not enough to maintain the relationship strong.
“Not at all, you know busy conflicting schedules..”
You will always feel that you need to be on your toes whenever you visit Richard at home because one thing for sure is the presence of his mama… just to check up on his baby’s happiness (of course Mommy dearest).
Even if one day Richard decides to move out from the cocoon, trust me, his new coordinates will be in the same neighborhood and a few minutes away from his mother. I mean who better prepares his food (mama) and takes care of the laundry (the help) one step away (sometimes literally).
Richard is a wonderful man. He has been well brought up (ok mama I give you that) and will respect you. He will remember your likes and dislikes and cater to you accordingly. He is good at cuddles (umm I don’t want to know the dynamics that lead to that characteristics- lol)
He understands you perfectly and does everything in his power to make you happy. He is a cup of sunshine and will know how to make you the happiest person alive. He is your lover and you best friend rolled in one.
Be on his mama’s good side and there you have it; the perfect threesome!
“Ohh I’m sorry Mama, I meant the perfect triangular relationship! I swear!!” – There goes Richard and his momma out the door. Good luck to you,(lucky girl) out there xo
(Featured image is a cartoon by Bryant Arnold titled “Mother’s Day 2010”)